Rock, paper, scissors for who gets to top.
Bros will be bros.
Bone down on bros, huhu
Tag: bro (Page 1 of 3)
“You. Locker room shower. Now.”
“Yes, sir,” said Mark.
You want that closet dick, you gotta play their game. Mark was always in control, always running the room, but he was perfectly willing to play along with the delusion that his boys were domming him. A lot of straight-identifying men can only be with another man if it’s clear he has all the power. That he can say no or stop whenever he wants and just leave. That he isn’t expected to reciprocate the “giving” of gay sex. And that’s all fine with Mark. It’s just a game. And Mark always wins.
Mark and all his Gym Bros
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“And women really like this, dude?”
“Oh yeah. Women LOVE a guy in a thong.”
“It’s just really tight. Hard to get off.”
“It’s all looking good from here, bro.”
“I don’t know. It all just feels a bit… a bit, you know…”
“A bit what?”
“Fag.”
“It’s not fag, bro. Now come here. I’ve got this sexy little sparkly crop top with a unicorn hood that your girl’s gonna fucking love, dude.”
Code bros will always help a bro be his sexiest. Factz.
“Bro, I-”
“Shhh, don’t worry about it. Just relax, I’ve got you.”
“Fuuuckk. I wouldn’t ask, but I’m just so pent-up. What with my girl being pregnant and-”
“I know, I know. You don’t have to explain. I love helping out a buddy.”
“Shit. I’ve missed this, bro.”
“Yeah, me too. Maybe after I’ll give you a rimjob. For old time’s sake.”
“Shit~”
Bone down on bros, huhu
Bro overhearing two of his teammates talking about fucking each other after the session. He’s getting oddly hard. You know, for a “straight” guy. He’ll store this away in the top secret spankbank for later and return to his game.
It’ll be our little secret
“Bro, there’s no way your chest is that big.”
“Oh yeah!” says the stupid bro at the gym. “I’ll show you, dude.” He takes off his tank to prove how fat his bro titties are.
“Okay, fine. But there’s no way your ass is that big.”
“Oh yeah!”
Bone down on bros, huhu
Code Rule #27: Be intimate enough with bro that you can freely touch any part of his body. Be familiar with bro’s junk, just not all gay like.
Learn the Code, bro
There’s a party downstairs, but you and bro have snuck off to the bedroom for a bit of R&R before you get back to it. Can’t be too long, though. Your girlfriends might start asking awkward questions. Again.
Bone down on bros, huhu
Dustin contemplating Mark’s offer. He told the lunk that if he wanted a piece of the best pussy he’d ever have, then don’t be shy. Now he’s just staring at Mark doing his Romanian deadlifts in his jockstrap and booty shorts and can’t believe he’s actually thinking about it.
Mark can believe it. That earring is very sus.
Mark and all his Gym Bros
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“And you promise it’ll make the itching stop?”
“Would I lie to you?” you said.
“No, dude. I trust you. If fucking me is the only way to get rid of that itch, then do it. The problem goes so deep, bro. Nothing I do can satisfy it.”
“This will satisfy it,” you said as you smacked your eight incher on your palm. “You don’t know it, dude, but your ass has been craving this for years.”
Jockboi’s getting ready to listen to today’s jock-file so he has to get into uniform. Which means he flips his cap back. He’s either in his football gear, or already dressed permanently for the gym. What other clothes are there, dude?
He’ll spend the next hour zoned out while Coach’s voice instils jock values into his ever-slowing brain. He’ll wake up with a painful dripping boner, which he’ll satisfy while watching some Coach-approved porn. Today, it’s some locker room scene where two guys flipflop and just call each other dude over and over again.
Then it’s time for a hearty meal of steak, potatoes and broccoli, washed down with coach’s special “jock juice” protein shake, before heading for his evening sesh at the gym with Joey and Gabe and Zach and Hiro and Jordan and Noah and Rory and…
Get Jocked
Read the Jocked novels here
Mark’s got one of his boys coming over to his pad – Aleksandr, a Russian dreamboat. Not unheard of. A lot of the dudes would rather hookup out of the gym for privacy reasons, and can’t hook up at their own houses cause of their girls.
Mark also knows this new bro wants his pussy shaved. That’s not usually Mark’s look, but he’s always willing to make an exception if the guy’s worth it. He shaved down, soaped up and is waiting to present his perfect pussy to the tanked Russian who’s been “fucking dudes on the DL for ten years.” Mark’ll wait until the sex is over before he makes his final judgment, but he thinks he’s gonna get on really well with this new guy.
Mark and all his Gym Bros
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“Could you show me again, bro?”
“Okay, but really lean your butt into me. You need the leverage.”
“No problem.”
Bone down on bros, huhu
“Tony, hurry up.”
“Yeah, one sec, babe. Just have to say goodbye to the fellas.”
Bone down on bros, huhu
“You said you wanted to touch my ass, right?”
“Yeah but… this just feels too gay, bro.”
“Of course it’s gay, but so what? Are you enjoying yourself?”
“Well, yeah, but…”
“And are you turned on?”
“…yeah.”
“Then what’s the problem? Keep massaging it. If you’re lucky, I’ll let you fuck me.”
“Holy shit!”
“Haha. You closeted boys, I swear.”
It’ll be our little secret
Bro about to declare war on some porcelain and knew he had to send a pre-battle selfie to all his Code bros. All the fellas agree, his weapon is up for the task. The bro rituals are… intricate. Yes, definitely intricate.
Learn the Code, bro
You and your bro just sharing your daily post-workout kissing sesh.
“No homo, bro?”
“No homo.”
“Love you, bro.”
“Fucking love you, bro.”
Bone up on bros here
“Nah dude, this is how you make out with a chick.”
“Fuuu.”
Bros help bros get good at the important shit.
Bone up on bros here
This went from “Let’s film a stupid video for the girls”, to “Bro, I wanna eat your face, you’re so damn hot” real fucking quick. Like seconds. I guess the girls are in for a bit of a shock.
Then again, maybe not.
Bone up on bros here
“Huhu, bro, no! It’s getting chubbed.”
“Then let go of my arm, dude.”
“Eeh, fuuu~”
Bone up on bros here
You joined a new gym that opened in your neighborhood. It claimed to be “inclusive”, which sounded righteous. Inclusivity rocks! Also it had a pool. You were sold. And what a good fucking decision that’s been. All the bros at the gym are crazy friendly. Right from the off, they insisted on kissing. Now listen – you’re a righteous bro, and you love a good tongue sesh with a fellow traveler. But usually you gotta wait a few weeks. Share a beer, watch a game, use his toilet, you know? But with these guys? Nah, bruh. They just go straight for the kiss. And you know what, that’s pretty fucking cool. It makes your workouts take twice as long though.
Bone up on bros here
There’s being in the closet, and then there’s this. Bros are just on a whole other level.
Bone up on bros here
Fun time with bro keeps getting more and more righteous. You’ve just come from your weekly Code meeting – all about how to be good, straight bros who never stray from good dude shit – which always gets you extra juiced for each other.
Learn the Code all good bros live by
When the bros are all pent up, but cause of No Homo, this is as far as they can take it. They’ll need some serious pussy when they’re done with their little petting sesh.
Bone up on bros here
“Like this, bro?”
“Yep, perfect.”
“You know I was going fucking hard at the gym. I could shower first-?”
“Nah, bro. I told you you’re perfect.”
“And if you rim me, I’ll stop getting chubbies around other dudes?”
“Oh yeah. Definitely. But I have to go for quite a while. Otherwise it won’t work.”
“If you say so, bro. I need to get control of this shit. It seems I can’t do anything with another guy without getting a boner these days.”
Ah, closeted meatheads. So stupid. So gullible. So sexy.
Bone up on bros here
You used to workout alone, closeted and angry. Then you met Tony and everything changed. Tony was long out the closet, long down the weight-lifting road and all too willing to teach you his ways. And now you were as jacked as him, as sexy as him and as committed as him. You make sure to kiss him tender before every set, just to show your appreciation for everything Tony’s done for you.
Become a man
Started as gay chicken, then just gay kissing, then suddenly “oh shit we’re doing this okay”.
Bone up on bros here
What was that about a boy’s only weekend up at the cabin? Well yeah, that’s exactly what is was about. The concoction of drugs these boys are rolling on is pretty righteous. Uppers, downers, poppers et al. Everything and anything to get their walls down and their dicks up. Imagine if their girls could see them now huhu.
Bone up on bros here.
While everyone looks away, the bros rub noses and think about the fun they’re gonna have later.
Bone up on bros here.
Taking a shower with your bro saves water. Think of the environment. And kissing your bro saves… emm… women from having to buy chapstick… or something…
Bone up on bros here.
You and bro go camping every other weekend during the summer, like ritual. Everyone thinks you’re just doing guy shit, like fishing and and hiking and stoking campfires. And that’s true. But the guy shit is a little more… intense than just that. Fuck, it started off innocent enough, just buddies spending quality time with each other. But I don’t know, something clicked in the both of you. Before you knew it, you were clothes-off, sucking down each other’s hogs like you’d never get another chance. And that’s kind of how it feels, right? Like, this is the last chance, cause this whole thing is a fantasy. But there you both are, every second weekend, sucking dick, fucking ass, kissing lips and generally doing “guy shit” in a way you never let yourself imagine before. And this is the real guy shit. Accept no substitute.
It’ll be our little secret
Bone up on bros here
Whenever you and bro get together, things get really physical. It’s all No Homo, obviously, but he’s just so fucking sexy that you can’t help yourself. His ass has more meat on it than any woman’s you’ve been with, and something about that just turns you on. Your boner strains your pants, leaking away like crazy. That makes you a little sus. Like, that seems kinda homo. But so long as at least one of you keeps your cock out of sight, anything you do is totally fine. That’s the rule, right? The goalposts keep changing when it comes to No Homo, but that sounds right. Man, you love spending time with your bro.
Bone up on bros here.
Your gay bro was telling you about his hook-up last night and you were playing along like a good bud.
“And then I fucking busted, dude. All over his cute face. He couldn’t believe how much splooge there was. It was funny.”
“Like this?”
You pretended to get cummed on.
“Exactly.”
“Haha, that’s awesome. I wish chicks would let you do that to them. They’re too worried about messing up their make-up.”
“You should hang with me and my fuck bros, bro. We’re non-stop busting on each other.”
“Eh… okay.”
There it was. You’d been waiting for him to give you an opening for months now. He assumed you weren’t into guys. Probably cause you were hella closeted and never dared express any interest in men. Little did he know that you’d been using his sex stories for your spank bank ever since you met the guy. And now, looks like you were gonna be part of it. Dream come true.
It’ll be our little secret
When your gay bro has been trying to get your dick for weeks. You keep turning him down cause you’re “straight” and “straight” guys don’t do that shit. Then he sends you this photo. You don’t know if it was his puckered blowjob lips, his fat bulge, his thick, beckoning ass spread-eagled for your dick, or just his needy fucking eyes. Either way, you drove over to his house as fast as you fucking could, all that nonsense about being “straight” long forgotten.
It’ll be our little secret
When you’re just minding your own business and bro storms up to you and starts making out. You couldn’t stop it if you wanted to, and fuck knows you don’t want to.
Bone up on bros here.
Yeah, just eat bros face. Fucking awesome! He must have just won a Smash tournament or something.
Bone up on bros here.
The girls have gone in to get changed, so you take the opportunity to have a quick 3-way kissing sesh with the boys.
Bone up on bros here.
When you and bro have gone on a decade-long bulk together and now you can’t even fit in the same car anymore.
Bone up on bros here.
Your best bud’s on his way over so you make sure to pump everything up for him. You want to look your best for bro.
Bone up on bros here.
Just a regular Friday night for these boys. Bro struck out with the chicks at the bar, so stumbled back to the house of his two gay besties and they fucked. Dude strikes out cause he always goes for the hottest chick, every time. They keep telling him that he should aim a bit lower, but he keeps telling them it’s 10s or the boys. Women aren’t worth the hassle unless they’re total bombshells.
Bone up on bros here.
You and your buddy always hang back after practice to get in your bro time. It’s the best part of the day.
Artist: Unknown
Bone up on bros here.
When you just can’t keep your hands off your gym bro when he wears his spandex. No homo, bro.
Unless…
Bone up on bros here.